Tuesday, November 19, 2013

last night: a retrospective

i've had 24 hours to think about last night's mad dash to lose weight before my weigh-in at tops. and while i don't condone my own methods, i am glad i did what i did.

1. the old me looked for any excuse to give up on anything. i'm not sure why this just popped into my head, but in the past if i was with a group of people going to an event in a big city, and we parked 6 blocks away,  i'd wish for all of the lights to turn red so we'd get to stop and rest at each block. last night i found ways to work more, to work harder, and to cram it into every last available second i had. the old me was never one to try to work more. i worked my hardest on finding ways to work less.

2. when i started this blog, i was on my juice fast. i went 18 days without food, then stuck to vegan and sometimes vegetarian options for months. i lost about 40 pounds. and then with one christmas cookie, it all unraveled until i'd gained that back, plus 20 more. it is that time of year again. if i had suffered that huge blow at tops last night, i'm afraid it would have put me into that mindset of "well i've had my first gain. maybe i can just enjoy a few treats this week." going into thanksgiving and christmas is NOT the time for me to lose momentum. if anything i need to be MORE diligent and work much, much harder. as long as i keep my streak alive, i will be motivated to keep it going. once i have that first gain, i fear i'll start to yo-yo a bit.

i fear the holidays. i know i should keep in mind that i am in control of everything that i eat. there's no holiday food that is going to just "happen to me." but as you've read, i also feel like i have a finite amount of willpower, and when it gets overly exhausted, i start to crumble. so here is my strategy:

1. thanksgiving week: weigh-in at tops on monday night, then work as hard as i can on tuesday and wednesday to get a deficit going. on thanksgiving morning i will run the turkey trot 5k, and then will attempt to be semi-judicious with my food. i don't care about mashed potatoes, rolls or noodles. i prefer my turkey cold, not hot. so at dinner i will have a plate of stuffing and sweet potato casserole - the two parts of dinner my mom only makes once a year. i will have 3 bites of peanut butter pie for dessert. oh, if there is some sort of baked corn concoction i may need a small helping of that as well. then i will take home enough turkey to make my annual leftover sandwich of turkey on white bread with helmann's mayo (miracle whip won't do), lettuce and cold stuffing on the side. then that has to be IT.

then i have friday, saturday, sunday and most of monday to fix whatever happens as a result.

know what i'm thankful for this thanksgiving? NOT LIVING WITH MY PARENTS! the thanksgiving meal is the least of the problems with thanksgiving. it's all of the leftovers in the fridge in the following days. i think i'd be out of bed at midnight making sandwiches out of stuffing using turkey as bread. followed by cold sweet potatoes and bites of pie.

2. christmas: yeah, i don't even know what i'm going to do. christmas is a month long, not just one day. there is going to be food at work almost every single day. tops is having a party at an italian restaurant. i mean i could just go on and on and on. so i guess THAT strategy is to get through it one day at a time.

if i can make it to january 2nd with no significant damage, i will feel like i can do anything.

but for now, let's just work on making it to next monday without needing to sweat it out at the last minute.

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